Blog. Over.

I guess putting off the inevitable is really just a form of denial. Recently I've been fight my way out of denial to finally accept that what I've been convincing myself is working really isn't, no matter how much effort I put into it.

The last two years has been, um, interesting to say the least. And while chronicling my adventures, mishaps, achievements, and disappointments has been enjoyable (and even a strangely therapeutic at times), in the end I couldn't shake the feeling that maintaining this was all just a burden of non-necessity…a task without purpose…a blog without meaning. How it outlasted the typical 90-day life span of most personal blog I have no idea. Now that I think about it, you can thank (or blame) Betty that I made it this far. :)

Maybe I'm drawing too many correlations between this blog and my own life. Both should be strongly based in purpose and for the past many months neither feel like they have. Fortunately for me, I'm finally fed up with just accepting things the way they are and starting to make my own change. I'm working on losing the cubical-mass that I've acquired over the past 5 years, I'm taking classes on the weekend to reawaken my brain, and I'm shedding the people, places, and things that draining me of my time, money, and happiness.

Things are easy to get rid of, but the real trick is withstanding temptation to run out and buy new things. I need to unclutter. What about people? Well, that's a slippery slope even on a good day (and you're screwed if they're people you're stuck with because you work together), but now I finally understand that if the people around you only want to be there for their own benefit you're just wasting your time and have no one to blame but yourself. I feel like an idiot that it's taken so long to accept that…lord knows I've been given plenty of lessons throughout life. Finally, there's places…which is going to be the most challenging as the bank may have a thing or two to say about whether or not I'm stuck here. It's time to move on, time to uproot, time for a change in scenery to match the other changes.

As I'm typing, I'm realizing that this, the process of changing my life to find satisfaction, could be just what the blog has been missing: a cohesive theme! But luckily for you, I'm not so narcissistic that I believe everyone out there on the interwebs is hanging on my every word. Even I'm not that interested in me, and I'm all I've got!

Is this the end of Gay Kenny Ray? For the blog, yes. For the man, no…it's a new beginning. (Are the italics too clichéd?) If we're both lucky, you may not recognize me the next time we meet.

Well, thanks for stopping by. I hope you enjoy the rest of your web browsing. Good bye.